Celebrate! Crappy Crocs Headed To The Giant Clearance Bin In The Sky

Yes, Christmas has come early!

Crocs, that most fug of footwear, could be going the way of the doo doo bird come September.

Despite all fashion sense and visual acuity, the label somehow managed to sell millions upon millions of pairs (100 mil to be exact) of those sweaty-foot causing plastic shoes over seven years.

Seriously, Crocs are the footwear equivalent of a giant "You will never have sex again" sign. Shudder.

I love comfy footwear as much as the next gal—yup, I practically live in flip flops until chilly temps force me into sensible shoes —but if I see another pair of those colorful plastic garden clogs on the city streets, expect the long, painful death of my inner style freak.

Case in point: Sunday afternoon. Downtown DC. A perfectly lovely girl in her mid-twenties wearing a sleeveless summer dress, a chic fedora, oversize aviators…and Crocs. For the love of fashion, why spoil a perfectly good outfit with these shoes that look more like garden hoses or colorful sponges than like actual footwear? Why?!

No comfort is worth the style shame.

Luckily, the universe has no room for this sort of hideousness, and as fate would have it, the economy crashed. Crocs customers realized their money is best spent on anything other than that absurdly ugly footwear.

Now let's all join hands and send out our collective karma vibes to the style gods that a similar fate befalls Uggs and all things Ed Hardy. . .