Friday, July 24, 2009

Maybelline Lash Stiletto: Lash Out Or Throw It Out?

It started so innocently--a look here, a lingering gaze there.

It was wrong and I knew it. I was happy with the one I had. God, we'd been together for ages.

But the thrill! The adventure of the unknown!

I was weak and gave in to temptation . . . to try a new mascara.

Straight brushes. Angles brushes. Curved brushes. Lengthening. Curling. Volumizing. I've tried them all. Whatever the package was selling, I was buying.

In high school I used L'Oreal Voluminous mascara almost exclusively. Then in college I dabbled with Maybelline Great Lash, Lancome Definicils, and others.

After a very brief fling with Revlon's 3D Extreme mascara and an ill-fated clumping incident with Mega Lash by Wet 'n' Wild, I'd finally found lasting results with Cover Girl's Lash Blast, you know, the one Drew Barrymore has been pimping. It lengthens, curls and volumizes like crazy and I was happy with my fabulously full and flirty lashes.

But then, the allure of of cute packaging seduced me to try Maybelline's Lash Stiletto. Shaped like a leg-lengthening dagger heel with that black-and-red combo recognized by fashionistas the world over, it promises to do the same for lashes.

for your lashes? I was powerless to resist.

Unfortch, once the heady anticipation faded, it was clear that Maybelline's boasts were little more than sweet nothings, focus group tested and Photoshopped for consumer consumption.

While it did lengthen, the bristly brush was so rough it was like using a toothbrush and the mascara was annoyingly goopy, giving me clumped-together lashes that Tammy Faye Baker would have envied. Plus, it had a weird odor that didn't exactly invite you to use it anywhere near your eye.

Epic fail--two snaps up in a "suck" formation. Lash Stiletto is so getting binned. It's not even enough worth keeping just for a quick lash lift before dashing out to Whole Foods. Hey, Maybelline, maybe next thing less focus on the flashy packaging and more on making a fabulash product, m'kay?

So my old reliable Lash Blast isn't sassy or sexy but a momentary mascara lapse proved that it's what's inside that counts.

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